Tuesday, September 29

; Just take the pain for granted.


As months of stay in Banting passed by, without even reflecting some of the inflection, neglecting some people around me, acting numb and even blurriness towards the whole life I would actually blend into this life for another 21 months here. I love the facts it is only 30 minutes journey from here to my home. Phew.

I do not want to judge anything about people. However, things are really come forward to me and I am acting numb as it is not my issue. Truthfully, it is actually distract my reputation and my feelings. They just don't get the real thing about any issue that keep on coming my way.

I was numb, and here was pain, trying to make its way, wanting to be acknowledged. Forceful, you were. Though I tried and tried to become ignorant, I tried to err on the side of optimism where things would always work out alright, if not alright, it would always work out the way He knows whats best, and hence I let it flow. But something is just not right. Something, just bothers my system.

It is all about the intention that you have set up as the mission that is always there to accomplish. Sometimes, I do take note of being so optimistic, but sometimes, I let it go beyond the dark side of me. Thinking how cruel life is.

I am not sure to love or hate you. Somehow, I forgot how to fall in love again or the worst part is to have the faith towards someone you are devoted to. Admittedly, now, I am not even sure I am talking about you or the other guy I just met.

Am I shifting the thoughts? Or losing the hope?

I mean, you have nothing to lose, and you have nothing to expect too. It is too vague. I do not know how far can I go with the expression and the terms from people around me anymore. Despite I have learn lots of thing to get the track with feelings. Something you cannot be forced to, but can be spread into the feelings itself.

I don't know how much longer I can go with the terms anymore. It is more difficult than the formula of e=mc2, that is the emotion. What do you expect?

Should I be rebellious against the law of attraction? Like I can handle them much.

My problem is.

I am making too many STUPID assumption about something, even it is about you and your unwashed hair. Nah.

Too clairvoyant, then it comes true.

Sheesh. I AM JUST NOT INTO HIM, okay? This is public truth.

These wall,

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